Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
