I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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