im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
