Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Randomize
