another moral hangover. fuck.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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