apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You took a bar mat shot.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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