the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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