Pappa wants mamma naked
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Randomize
