ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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