Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize