he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
