I'm laying in your front yard are you home
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Randomize
