he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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