That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
