Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
there was a trapeze. enough said
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
