So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
