Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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