whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize