Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Shitshow foam night was such a success
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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