So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
The struggles of a small town man whore
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
