how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
