If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
