I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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