I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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