wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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