remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize