Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize