Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
