New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
