In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
