I feel like abortions should bother me more
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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