I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
