This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
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