Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
