He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
