she kept yelling 'call me bella'
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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