no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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