By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
