if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Is it because I queefed?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
