You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
