you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
