it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
