i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
