If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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