My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
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He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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