Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
