I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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