belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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