Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Randomize
