idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
