can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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