at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
